"It's my life and I'm not sitting on the sidelines watching
It pass me by
I'm leaving you my legacy
I gotta make my mark
I gotta run it hard
I want you to remember me
I'm leaving my fingerprints
I'm leaving my fingerprints
Don't give up
Don't give in
Build your house on the rock
Oh not in the sand, in the sand, in the sand, in the saaaaaand"

I like to sing this song at the top of my lungs to my son as we dance around my office. If I could turn it up louder on the imac speakers without blowing them out, I absolutely would. Yeah, it's Katy Perry and alot of her songs are very "meh.." but girl can sing and she's the long lost twin to my number one style icon, Ms. Deschanel. So, naturally, I am sort of a fan, some of the time.

With our long summer break as a 3some draws to a close, I am reflecting on what was accomplished and enjoyed over the past almost 3 months. And I had a realization today. I was a complete slacker. ALL. SUMMER.

I strayed from my weekly routine of grocery shopping/cleaning/cooking/laundry/treat-baking/mama+baby time. I slept in past Sawyers wake up time almost every day. Bless my sweetheart of a husband who got up before I even heard the little dude every day, and asked me "why'd you get up?" when I would wander downstairs after breakfast had been served and cleaned up. I cleaned every 2 weeks (if that) and didn't plan dinners or hardly make any. I shopped and went off budget entirely. I got dizzy and handed the baby off to Dad a lot. I flaked out on life.

This was supposed to be Spencer's summer break. Mom works year round for Mr. Sawyer, and yet, here I was, taking all the personal time off I wanted. It is no surprise to me (or anyone else, I imagine) that I am far more selfish than my husband. But I didn't realize how selfish I have been recently. Where I lack, he always makes up. He steps up, each and every time. I know I will spend our entire lives together wishing I could be more like him.

And with that jab at myself, I am making an end of summer resolution. (totally made that up)

For the rest of 2009 I will make a concerted effort each day to be better to and for all the people I love. Summer slacker, no more. Time to enjoy this little life I have and all the good stuff within it.

Let's go, August-December of '09.

And to repay the man for his hard work as other-mother this summer, I am tentatively planning a Padres getaway weekend in September. But we will stay at my favorite, The Omni. Is that me being selfish again?

Dangit.